Did you know you get to choose? Who you are is not fixed. In fact, we have many selves. It is said that you are the actor. You play different parts for all the various roles you play: parent, child, sports enthusiast, teacher, student, employee, boss, creative.

It depends where you are and who you are with which role you play.

The secret is to connect to the part of you that stays the same—no matter how old you get; it is still there with you all the time.

This part of you knows when you are naughty or nice—it’s not the inner critic, it’s deeper than that. Some call it intuition, conscience, the Self. It’s connected to everything else as an energy flow. This energy can be in resonance or dissonance. HeartMath LLC has been studying this energy for decades and how it affects the heart. For instance, being in nature brings the heart rate into resonance with the earth’s rhythms. When you have a heated argument, it can put the heart into dissonance for many hours, unless you intervene: take a break outdoors, or quietly stretch and move the body gently to soothing music.

When you are in resonance, your energy can flow wherever you direct it.

You can flow from work to lunch with a friend to home with your kids, shifting your persona slightly or dramatically to meet the moment, to meet people where they are. This shift can only happen if you are present with mind, heart and body. If your mind is still at work, your partner or kids will sense you aren’t really with them.

Inhabiting your body consciously allows you to be aware of sensations, your environment and the people around you. Connecting to your heart allows feelings to surface and what is needed becomes apparent. Compassion arises. Noticing thoughts, you can bring yourself back to meet the moment fully and appropriately.  

In the larger picture, reflect on how you changed in 2022.

We’ve been through three years of a global pandemic. Life and you are different. Recognizing that, who are you today? Don’t let an outmoded ideal of yourself get in the way. Many adjustments had to be made. Strengths you didn’t know you had carried you through.

You were resilient in a way you didn’t know was possible and you were reshaped in the process.

Acknowledge your new shape. Many of you have realized that you no longer fit the role you were playing, and you’ve moved on. Sometimes tiny tweaks are enough, for others, a whole life change is in order. The one thing that’s for sure is that 2023 demands a new strategy. Witnessing over a million people die in this country alone from the pandemic shows how uncertain and impermanent life is. Being intentional with who you want to be and what you want to accomplish can help you achieve more in the coming year. There is not a moment that is not precious, or where you are not needed.

Who do you want to bring to 2023?