Having an ideal vision for how the world should be is lofty and noble, and can give you hope for a better future. However, there is a downside and that is disappointment when people and events don’t meet your ideal. 

As an Enneagram type 7, anticipating events, I was filled with ideas about what was going to happen and how fun it would be. When it actually happened, it was often a letdown from the excitement I’d built leading up to it. It always baffled me why I seemed to enjoy thinking about things more than doing them.

In my mind, everything is going to be a breeze. When something thwarts me, I get frustrated and want to move on. It takes a lot of discipline to bust through the frustration. Once I do, then I  complete the project with much more ease.

Sevens are part of the Idealist or Frustration triad in the set of Harmony Triads, along with Ones and Fours. Harmony triads group together types that have similar ways of seeing and responding to the world. Idealists have a vision for the way the world could and should be, but become frustrated when reality doesn’t measure up to the ideal. 

• Sevens use the asserting strategy to get what they want and are frustrated when it doesn’t go their way, or what they are doing is not stimulating enough to hold their attention. Frustration is a way to hold back deeper feelings of fear from uncertainty and insecurity caused by the loss of the sacredness and beauty of the now.
• Ones use the balancing or complying strategy to get what they want by complying to an internal set of standards, and are often frustrated that they and others fall short. Frustration is an outlet for unacknowledged anger that they don’t have control, and so they feel not good enough. They fail to appreciate and trust the inherent perfection in all of life.
• Fours get frustrated and withdraw their energy when they don’t feel heard or understood. Frustration masks the underlying feeling of sadness from thinking they don’t belong. They have an ideal about how close and meaningful connections should be and are disappointed when relationships and life fall short. Fours lose the sense of richness and wholeness of life by always focusing on what is missing.

Frustration is a wake up call when you are out of flow and aren’t accepting what is happening. The underbelly of idealism is expectations. When you have a preconceived notion about who someone is or how something should play out, more than likely you will be disappointed.

Acceptance is the way to overcome frustration and have appreciation for all of life, no matter what happens.

Acceptance brings freedom to savor each moment as it comes and appreciation of people for who they are. Then your anticipation is simply for the adventure of the mystery that is always unfolding. 

Enjoy the journey!